Vocabulary Vixen

July 16, 2009

Birds of a feather…

Filed under: Reflections — VocabularyV @ 9:19 PM

…poop together… I’ve got a mess on my hands. Or rather, on my car…

Why is it, then, do ALL of the birds in a 10 mile radius like to congregate in THE TREE above MY CAR in the parking lot every day? Seriously, cleaning bird shit off of my car is the highlight of my day. I get to drive around town, and watch people take a look at my bird poop covered car and shake their heads. “Yep, I’m driving my car. It is covered in bird poop.” I went to the gas station last night to clean at least the windshield and make a half-hearted attempt at cleaning the hood of my car. I never thought that bird poop could have a smell, but once it gets caught in your engine grates in large amounts, HOLY SHIT (pun absolutely intended), IT STINKS!! Ew.

I’ve looked around at the other cars in the parking lot and adjacent parking lots. THEY don’t have bird polka-dot poop on THEIR cars. WHAT GIVES?! Seriously, I’m just left wondering why their absolute favorite tree to congregate in the entire city is the tree above my parking spot that I pay for with my rent. WTF?! I had been talking to a friend about this, and she told me later “Well, I know you’re a little OCD-ish, so I thought it was maybe one or two bird poops, but DAMN! YOUR CAR IS REALLY COVERED!!!” Yeah, it is. I’m not exaggerating. I would take a picture of it, but since I went through the motions of putting a haz-mat suit on and scraping it off after it getting baked onto my car in 90 degree heat, I’m not really willing to park my car in my parking spot again. In fact, I’m perfectly happy waiting until the leaves start falling off the trees and the birds decide to congregate at their winter pooping place. It really is okay.

I’d forgotten about this nasty little summertime tidbit since we’d moved in last August. I had this problem for a little while, and then the winter hit. Which, of course, lasts an eternity. At least long enough to forget about the flock of birds having their daily meeting in the tree above my car. Do they get extra pooping material from the coffee shop nearby? Wow. It’s ridiculous, actually.

Whew, now that I’ve got THAT load off of my mind… I can enjoy and relish in the fact that I’m not blogging into a cyberspace void. There are actually one or two people reading my blog! That’s very exciting, and that’s where it starts. For now, I will keep writing. Hopefully, I will be interesting enough to gain a valid following. And maybe one day my writing can be published and taken seriously. Like in a book or something.



  1. I’m not sure if I register in your blog stats because I don’t normally come to the actual site; I subscribe to it via Google Reader. So, just letting you know I exist and I read your blog regularly!

    Comment by teambaby — July 17, 2009 @ 5:19 PM | Reply

  2. Sweet! That’s awesome! Thank you, and I appreciate it! I *do* see that there are a few readers, and that my readers have been coming on a somewhat regular basis, which is fabulous! 🙂

    Comment by VocabularyV — July 17, 2009 @ 6:51 PM | Reply

  3. Tis a conspiracy. I feel you. In a plautonic “we both have poo on our green cars” way.

    Comment by soundsliketomatoes — July 29, 2009 @ 9:04 AM | Reply

  4. Seriously. lol. I feel you, too… In that “we both have bird poop on our green cars” way, of course…

    Comment by VocabularyV — July 29, 2009 @ 12:08 PM | Reply

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